I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize