before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
