I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
