I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize