brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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