I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
