i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
