1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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