Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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