ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize