Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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