Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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