I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
