I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
