You're so nebulous sometimes
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
