She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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