White coat. Heels.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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