Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Randomize
