Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
They have beer where we have blood.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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