I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize