wake up i wanna do it froggy style
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
