I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize