if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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