hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
