I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
