hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
