But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I wanna passion pit in your ass
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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