1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
