I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
