Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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