There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
