my mouth tastes like poor choices
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize
