You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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