She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
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