I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
That accounts for only three of the penises
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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