Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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