"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I party with great urgency now.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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