"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
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