Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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