spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
