I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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