The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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