Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
