He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
