walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
