There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
