He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
