garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
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