When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
