Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize