Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
