these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
